The NHS trust that runs Ealing Hospital, Central Middlesex Hospital and Northwick Park has shone a light on the often-overlooked issue of male victims of domestic abuse in an online session as part of its Spotlight Series: shining a light on hidden harms.
London North West University Healthcare NHS Trust (LNWH) invited speakers with lived experience, including Richard Spencer, who suffered abuse from his wife for more than two decades before a friend intervened and contacted authorities.
Mr Spencer, who featured in the documentary My Wife, My Abuser, described how the violence escalated from “condescending remarks” to being “punched, kicked, slapped” and having “things thrown” at him.
He said: “Each attack was followed by periods of calm and I ended up just getting through each day with no thought of the future. A lot of people still think the idea of a woman being able to hurt a man isn’t something to be taken seriously… I became estranged from my family, was worried that the authorities wouldn’t believe me and, wrongly, believed my wife would change.”
His message was clear: “Don’t justify it, shrug it off or think that you are to blame.”
Other cases highlighted included a former soldier, who served in Iraq and Afghanistan, tormented by his wife, and NHS manager Gareth Jones, who lost four-and-a-half stone while being denied access to basic hygiene by his partner.
A recent SafeLives survey revealed that over 50,000 NHS staff have experienced domestic abuse in the past year, with nurses three times more likely to be victims.
The trust’s series will cover 23 themes including coercive control, stalking, and abuse within LGBTQ+ and disabled communities.
For help and advice with domestic abuse, click here.
